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Writer's pictureSheila

Disappearing Bermuda Relish Canapés

Updated: Apr 27, 2022

When I first saw this recipe, I thought surely something originally created by James Beard had to be good. Right? Prepare to be underwhelmed. This recipe was adapted from the James Beard classic Onion Sandwich for The Old-Time Brand Name Cookbook by Bunny Crumpacker. No, I did not make that name up, but I'm fairly sure she did.



This recipe is pretty simple, it just includes:


6 slices of white bread, crusts removed (I used brioche)

1-2 tablespoons sweet butter, room temperature

1/4 pound cream cheese, room temperature

6 thin slices of red or Vidalia onion (I used Vidalia)


To make these, you toast one side of the bread. I did this in the toaster on the bagel setting because no one has time to wait for the oven to warm up. Then, you smear cream cheese while desperately trying not to screw up the bread. I was not successful at not destroying the bread - I probably should have softened my cream cheese more first. And then lay the onion on top of the cream cheese, and smear with more cream cheese. Bake at 350 for 10 minutes.


All in all, these weren't bad. They are very white and plain-looking, and the onion was still pretty raw. But other than that, it's what you'd expect for cream cheese on toast with onion. They needed a little something else to make them less onion-y. So, we combed through our fridge and tried topping them with a few different things we had on hand, including:

  • Hot Sauce

  • Thai Sweet Chili Sauce

  • Chili Garlic Sauce

  • Grape Jelly

I have to admit, we were really reaching on some of these. My husband declared the grape jelly the winning condiment much to my dismay. Salty-sweet combinations break my brain. I wasn't satisfied, so I made another round in which I used caramelized onions, and those were the best.



Final Verdict: Passable. Just caramelize your onions first. And throw out that grape jelly nonsense.

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